Club Calypso: Survivor

Week Four

Inda's Narration, Week Four:
     The sun rises over the Straits of Calypso. The tribe stirs. The ravages of illness have left the tribe weakened and cranky. Except for Daniela.
     I really don't get it. We have cameras following her at all times. She goes into the woods. The cameras show her splashing her face in the fresh-water spring we set up. Then she comes out, looking like she just had a seaweed wrap at one of those Newshregsburg day spas. Everyone else does the same thing, and everyone else has broken out in pimples or psoriasis. There's something not-quite-normal about Daniela.
     Wait a minute, I just realized what I said. Never mind.
     Here we are on the day of the challenge, week four. Time for a wakeup call.

***

Marianna was in the middle of a dream involving vast quantities of pina coladas and a ten-foot submarine sandwich. Suddenly, a fog rolled in, right over the part of the sandwich filled with ham. A fog horn penetrated the gray mist of her consciousness.
     It took three more blasts on Inda's air horn for Mari to even realize it was coming from *outside* her head.
     Finally, Inda gave up (on threat of death from the other, conscious Survivors) and let Daniela wake Mari up in a time-honored DeSka tradition-- grabbing her older sister's sleeping bag by its bottom and shaking Mari out.
     "GOOOOOOOoood morning!" Mari said sleepily as she flipped over in the sand.
     "Are you drunk?" Dani asked.
     "Nope, just... pleasantly hung over, thanks," Mari smiled, trying to keep her eyes open. "I finished off the rum last night in celebration of not being sick anymore." She was on her back, looking up. Everyone was upside-down from here.
     "You had rum leftover? That was two weeks ago," UPChuck said, amazed at Mari's ability to ration her liquor.
     "Three weeks," Mari corrected. "And man, it was killin' me to hold back. This island rots."
     "Well, yes," UPChuck agreed.
     "I rather like it here," Dream said.
     "Yeah, well, you don't eat anyway," Dani sniffed. "Or use electricity. You like trees and nature and crap."
     "Okay, settle, people," Inda sighed. "We've got to do this challenge thing."
     Everyone groaned. After last week's challenge, everyone was about ready to vote themselves off the island. Of course, they'd all gotten that tropical virus last week, too. Except Daniela... hmm...
     "Please tell me it's not to eat something disgusting," Dava said, mouth twisting.
     "Or anything involving nudity," Dani added. She glanced sideways at UPChuck, but it was really obvious.
     "Neither of those," Inda said. "My stomach still isn't back to normal. We're going to take it easy for a while. Back to my original plan."
     "Phew!" The five remaining Survivors breathed a collective sigh of relief.
     "I got my idea from something Mari said last week." Bodies tensed again, and Mari racked her brain for what she could have possibly said last week that would be a viable challenge.
     "Pin the tail on the donkey," Inda grinned, lifting the poster of a donkey out of a satchel.
     Everyone groaned. UPChuck said, "That's the challenge?"
     "Hey, buddy, it was your complaints that got us the 'treasure hunt' in the first place," Mari reminded him.
     "Hey, good challenge!" UPChuck said, grinning broadly.
     "I knew you'd think so," Inda nodded.
     "What an ass," Daniela murmured.
     Inda's head whipped around. "Excuse me?" he said frostily. He and Dani had been at odds ever since the treasure hunt debacle.
     "I was talking about the donkey picture," Dani said, smiling sweetly, eyes aglow with innocence. "It's quite good."
     Inda glared and started to tack the donkey picture up on a nearby tree. "The rules are..."
     "Rules?" Mari laughed. "Now, I may be hungover and slightly tired to boot, but last I checked the only 'rule' for this game is 'no peeking'."
     "Okay, fine, 'rule,' singular." Inda wondered precisely when this had become a show about picking on him. "And that goes for psychic peeking, too, you telepaths. Now, who wants to go first? Somebody get over here and get blindfolded."
     "Mari's not a telepath, she's a sociopath," Dava muttered.
     "I heard that, ya blue-haired freak."
     "You're the one with just one little streak of pink," Dava shot back.
     "If you two don't stop it, I'm going to drown you," Daniela threatened. "And then I'm damn well swimming to shore and nature-girl and squirrel-boy can *have* the stupid island."
     "Would somebody get over here and get blindfolded!" Inda shouted.
     Everyone fell silent.
     "I'll go first," Dream said meekly.

***

Five minutes later...
Inda rubbed his arm, which was swathed in white sterile bandages. "All right, we'll try this again," he growled at Daniela, who was still blinking her perfect eyelashes in apparent surprise. After Dream had stuck her tail in the donkey's eye, Dani had taken her turn. After the usual three spins around, she'd promptly stuck her tail into Inda's arm. Repeatedly.
     "Could have been worse," Mari shrugged. Inda turned his snarl on her. "Just saying..." Her pleasant buzz was rapidly fading under Inda's hostility and Dava's psychic onslaught. She was pretty sure he didn't even realize it, but all his negative vibes were boring right into her hippocampus and harshing her mellow. Or something like that. Anyway, the morning was rapidly degenerating.
     "As you can see, we've switched to a sticker version of this game," Inda continued, "and to be entirely fair, although I don't know why we should be, we're letting Dream and Daniela have another try."
     "I liked the pins better," Daniela said. "More realistic."
     "Realistic how?" Mari asked.
     "Shut up, please," UPChuck moaned. "Inda, could the prize this week be a bottle of aspirin? I could use a couple."
     "Sorry, prizes have already been chosen for all the weeks. Dream, here's your tail sticker."
     "That sounds dirty," Daniela giggled. Everyone ignored her.
     Dream obediently allowed Inda to put the blindfold on again, spin her three times, and aim her generally in the direction of the tree. This time she managed to stick the tail near the donkey's bum, but not actually on the donkey.
     "Good job. Very close," Inda said. "Daniela?"
     "Yes?" she pouted. After having been ignored, she always pouted.
     "Your turn."
     "Oh." She aimed much better this time, landing the tail at least on the piece of paper. She pulled up the blindfold and looked at her work. "Damn. I liked it better the first time."
     "I'll bet you did. Who's next?"
     Mari, UPChuck and Dava eyed each other warily. "I'll go," Mari volunteered. "Might as well get the party games over with and move on to the taquitos and margaritas. Can the prize be taquitos and margaritas?"
     "No," Inda said, pulling the blindfold maybe a little tighter than he really needed to. Mari squelched her protest. He'd get his later. When they were back on the mainland. When she had access to the kitchen knives from the Club.
     She allowed him to spin her three times, then swallowed as last night's rum did a rumba in her stomach. She cautiously approached the tree, resisting the impulse to use her sixth sense to find the target. Her knuckles grazed paper, then the plasticky feeling of what she figured was Dream's tail. She guessed about an inch to the left, then stuck her own tail on the paper.
     Mari tugged at the blindfold, but it was tight enough that she couldn't get it off on her own. And the knot wasn't budging, either. "Damn you, Inda, the stupid blindfold won't come off!"
     "You just drank too much last night," he said. She felt his fingers picking at the knot on the back of her head.
     "This reminds me of when--" she stopped short before completing the thought.
     "Of what?" Dani asked.
     "None of your beeswax."
     "I bet I know," Dream said.
     "No, you really don't," Mari said. The blindfold was still over her eyes. "What the hell? What did you do, tie some weird sailor's knot?"
     "I'm not sure what happened. Hold on..." Inda made scuffling noises behind her. She really did not like not being able to see, and her psychic powers wouldn't give her an accurate visual, just more information on the position of his body. It was like an infrared sensor.
      "Inda, is that necessary?" Dream asked. Mari held her breath, not wanting to know.
     "It's the fastest way," Inda replied.
     "I still want to know what this reminds you of," Dani persisted. "Something with Mac? Or with someone else?"
     "Dani, it really is none of your business. It's nobody's business but mine and... someone else's." Finally, the pressure on her eyes ceased and the blindfold fell off. "Ah, sweet daylight," Mari breathed, eyes opening. She turned around, and immediately jumped back, screaming, "INDA! Are you insane?!"
     He was holding a two-foot machete, which apparently he'd used to slice the blindfold. "Not any more than usual. You?" he asked.
     "You had that thing near my head?"
     "You wanted the blindfold off."
     "You apparently want something else off," she said menacingly, stalking toward him and holding a hand out to snatch the machete. "Where did you get that thing, anyway?"
     "Borrowed it from one of the crew guys," he said, swinging it out of her reach and sending the other Survivors scattering. "Does it make you any more inclined to finish the game according to my rules?"
     "As long as there are no more blindfolds..." Mari muttered, giving up. "I really, really just want to get out of here. I can't vote myself off here, huh?"
     "No," Inda smiled cheerfully. "You can try to convince the others to vote you off, though."
     "I hate to interrupt the psychopath and the guy with the machete," Dava said.
     "Hey!" Mari said, looking around for a coconut to chuck at him.
     "But I'd like to get this challenge over with so I can forage for breakfast," he completed. Mari frowned. There were no coconuts in their immediate area. "Is there another blindfold?"
     "Sure," Inda said, snapping the fingers of his free hand at one of his production assistants. She trotted over with a bandana and tied it on Dava.
     He was spun around and handed a tail, then staggered over to the tree and landed his tail roughly in the middle of the donkey.
     Marianna turned around to watch, and realized she'd hit the "X" target exactly. Why, then, was everyone else still trying?
     UPChuck took his turn and answered her question. He took a while to do it, but eventually taped his tail right on top of Mari's.
     "Looks like we need a tie-breaker," Inda said gleefully, still brandishing his machete. Everyone watched him warily from at least six feet away. "How about--"
     "Darts?" Mari asked hopefully.
     "Thumb wrestling," Inda said, turning his crazed eyes on her.
     "Okay, that's good too." She turned to UPChuck and held out her right hand.
     "I'm left-handed," he said.
     "Crap, I forgot. Inda..." Mari looked over her shoulder at their newly-insane host. "Never mind. I can thumb wrestle with my left hand."
     "Then you'll be at a disadvantage," UPChuck pointed out.
     "At this point, dear, I really don't care."
     He shrugged and linked fingers with her. "One, two, three, four," they counted together. "We're gonna have a thumb war."
     Everyone save Inda gathered around to watch the action. Normally, they would choose sides and cheer for their favorite, but everyone on the island was kind of ticked at each other right now. And afraid of Inda and his machete. A complete disconnect was probably the safest idea.
     Mari grunted and twitched impatiently. She really was at a disadvantage. For brute force, her left arm was on a par with her right, but for fine motor skills like this, she got tired quickly and her aim was terrible.
     Finally, UPChuck pinned her. "Whew," he said. "I thought that would never end."
     "I had to give up," Mari shrugged. "I need my breakfast banana."
     "Yeah," he nodded, wisely choosing not to call her out. "So Inda, what's the prize?"
     Inda handed the machete to his production assistant (finally!) and pulled a bar of chocolate out of his pocket with a bizarrely toothy smile. "It's a Night-Capp Bar from Surf Strip Chocolatiers, an energizing combination of pure espresso and the finest Argentinian dark chocolate! Available only at Surf Strip Chocolatiers!"
     "Sponsor?" Mari asked the PA, in direct violation of the Rules.
     "Sponsor," the PA nodded. "But they're really good."
     UPChuck took the bar from Inda. "Thanks. I don't really eat chocolate, but..."
     "ME!" Mari, Dani and Dream cried at the same time, lunging for UPChuck.
     "This is a first," he said, gasping for air under the weight of three chocolate-starved women.
     "I have PMS," Mari announced. "Hands off, bitches."
     "TMI!" Dani said, not giving up her grip on the candy.
     "Yeah," Dream said. She attempted, unsuccessfully, to use a pressure point pinch on Dani. "But in the spirit of disclosure... me, too."
     "Me three," Daniela admitted, shoving an elbow into Mari's midsection.
     "Uh, ladies?" UPChuck grunted. "As pleasant as this is... kind of... if you let me up, I'll split it evenly between the three of you. Unless Dava wants a piece?"
     "Of what?" Dava snorted. "No, actually, I don't want any of it-- chocolate or the rest."
     As Mari got up, a leg shot out and kicked Dava in the kneecap. "Ooh, sorry. I'm always uncoordinated this time of the month."
     "That seemed plenty coordinated," Dava muttered, rubbing his knee and backing away.
     UPChuck unwrapped the candy bar and snapped it into three equal pieces. "All right, here you go," he said, handing out the candy the way he handed out head-pats to his legion of squirrels.
     Mari took one bite, allowing it to melt slowly in her mouth, then wrapped the rest in a banana leaf for later. Dani and Dream just sucked theirs down, and Mari almost doubted her decision to ration. It passed, and she put the chocolate in her pocket.
     "Is that it for today's structured activity?" UPChuck asked. "Because I think I'll go for a walk with the squirrels if it is."
     "Ooh, can I go with?" Dream asked.
     "Please," Dani gagged. "I'll walk in the opposite direction."
     "We'll walk away from the volcano, then," UPChuck said.
     Mari glanced around, thought for a moment, then went back to her sleeping bag and buried herself in it. Why bother staying awake for this?

***

Hours later, Mari awoke to silence. As much as she cherished such a thing, it immediately made her suspicious. She slid her head out of the sleeping bag enough to peek one eye out. Dava was quietly staring out at the water, where Inda's yacht was anchored.
     "Whatcha doing?" Mari asked. "You'll go blind staring at the water at midday."
     "Oh, you're awake," Dava said, barely glancing over at her. "Doesn't matter if I go blind. Maybe it'll get me off this island."
     "You don't care about the money?"
     "No. I just did it because I was bored."
     "Oh." Mari looked down at the sand and traced a finger through it. "I actually need the money."
     "Don't you have a net worth of over a million?"
     She pinched some sand and let it trickle between her fingers. "Yeah. But that's all real estate. I'm not selling my house. I'd have to move back in with Mac, and he's not set up for a kid."
     "Right. I forgot."
     They were quiet again for a moment, each lost in their own thoughts.
     Mari sighed. "I'm sorry."
     "For what?"
     "Most immediately, for kicking you. And for... all the other things I've done since we've been here. I realize I haven't been terribly mature lately."
     "PMS, right?" Dava shrugged.
     "No, I'm just stupid."
     "You're not. It's all right, I kind of expect you to be hostile toward me."
     "Well, it's not your fault what happened. It's my fault. You're the one who should be hostile toward me."
     Dava finally actually looked at her. "Is that an invitation?"
     Mari blinked. "Not really. Can we call truce?"
     "Only if you promise to vote me off this island."
     Just then, a loud crashing came from the direction of the jungle, followed by horrible, off-key singing.
     "Promise," Mari said hastily, then untangled herself from the sleeping bag and stood up, peering into the darkness of the jungle.
     "Raindrops keep fallin' on my head," Daniela and Dream bellowed, leaping along the path in a twisted choreographed dance. "Just like the guy whose feet were too big for his beeeeed!"
     "Nothing seems to fit," Mari joined in cautiously. "What happened to you two? And where is UPChuck?"
     "Raindrops keep fallin' on my head, they keep fallin'," Dani kept singing.
     Dream stopped, hands on knees, panting. "I don't know where he is, but man, that's some strong espresso in that chocolate bar."
     "Yeah," Mari nodded. "You never have coffee. And Dani rarely does. No wonder you've reacted like this."
     A glitter caught Dream's eye, a piece of sea glass on the beach, and she was off again.
     "Mari, Mari, Mari," Dani said, hopping up to her sister.
     "What did you do to UPChuck?"
     "Nothing. Can I have more chocolate? I know you have more. Please-please-please?" She kept hopping up and down, from one foot to the other.
      "No. Go away. Dava, I think we'd better look for Uly. Those two..."
     "Agreed," Dava said, joining them and directing Dani's attention to the sea glass that had Dream captivated.
     "Ooh, shiny!" Dani exclaimed, and she was off and running.
     Mari shook her head. "She used to be like this all the time."
     "I remember," Dava said. "Psychic search, or normal?"
     "Psychic would be faster, if I won't get sanctioned by the administration for using my powers."
     "I'll represent you."
     "Cool." She grabbed his hand, noticing that his hands were still freezing, like they'd always been when they were in high school.
     'So?' he thought at her.
     'Just saying,' she shrugged. Then she started expanding her consciousness to look for UPChuck.
     It took only moments before they found him, in a tree in the "forest" part of the island. A nervous, disjointed cluster of primitive thought on the periphery of the psychic sensation indicated that UPChuck was with his squirrels.
     "Normally, I'd say let him be, but I think he needs to be retrieved," Mari said.
     "I concur." Dava glanced back at the beach, where Dani and Dream were now engaged in a hyper splashing fight complete with high-pitched shrieking. "We can both go, right?"
     "I suppose they won't drown themselves. Or each other. And maybe the espresso will wear off before we get back."
     "I can only hope."

***

They found UPChuck treed by squirrels, which seemed kind of weird. First, because the squirrels could certainly climb the tree and attack him if they really wanted to. Second, because until a few hours ago, the squirrels had been worshipping him.
     "Hi," he called down to them.
     "Hi," Mari called up. "What's up, besides you?"
     "Oh, the squirrels are jealous."
     "Of..."
     "Dream."
     Mari and Dava exchanged a glance.
     "I thought they liked her," Dava said. "She's part tree or something."
     "Tree spirit," Mari said distractedly. Some of the squirrels were starting to eye her maliciously. Or maybe curiously, she wasn't really an expert on squirrel expressions.
     "She was dancing with Daniela," UPChuck said. "And singing... kind of. She doesn't usually sing like that."
     "She doesn't usually have the equivalent of a shot of espresso running through her bloodstream, either." Mari narrowed her eyes challengingly at the nearest squirrel. It seemed ridiculous to challenge something smaller than a house cat, but then this whole adventure was ridiculous.
     "True. Anyway, I was watching her and the squirrels got mad because I wasn't playing with them."
     Dava shivered as more squirrels turned to stare at him.
     "All right," Mari nodded. "I see what needs to be done here." Before anyone could blink or read her mind, she pulled a Swiss Army knife out of her cutoffs pocket and brandished it at the nearest cluster of squirrels. They jumped back hissing. "I didn't know squirrels could hiss."
     "Yes, of course they can," UPChuck said, just before the entire herd (?) of squirrels charged Mari and Dava.
     Mari, being practical, kept swinging her little knife at as many squirrels as she could, grabbing and throwing the rodents with her other hand. Several hit trees and ground with a "thunk!"
     Dava fought off as many as he could with his fists, but finally decided it would be easier to use his psychic talents to control the evil little minds. It didn't work very well, but he did at least get them to move out of his psychic range.
     Mari finally speared one squirrel through its tiny ribcage, completely shocking herself and everyone else in the clearing. UPChuck dropped out of the tree as the squirrels fled into the depths of the island.
     "You actually killed it!" he gasped, horrified.
     "Well... I... guess I did," Mari said, pulling the squirrel off of the knife and holding it by the tail away from her.
     "I didn't know you had it in you," Dava said. "Knives aren't your style."
     "One accident in high school," Mari glared. "And this was an accident, too. It was, like, a kamikaze squirrel. I swear, it jumped on the knife."
     They stood in silence while the squirrel dripped blood. Mari looked at the two men nervously. Nobody knew what to say.
     "Well," Mari said finally. "No sense letting this happen in vain. We're having squirrel kabobs for dinner!"

***

Around the fire that night, a speared, skinned squirrel dripped fat and turned golden brown.
     "I can't believe you're actually eating a squirrel," Dream moaned, covering her mouth and nose and turning away.
     "I can't believe you killed your own food," Dani said in awe. "That's, like, medieval. And kind of cool."
     "His name was Kevin," UPChuck said mournfully.
     "Now his name is dinner," Mari said stubbornly. "Dani, Dava, would you like some squirrel? I think it's almost done."
     "Not really," Dani said. "It smells good, but it's just too weird."
     "I'll take a piece," Dava said, holding out his coconut shell bowl. "What do you think it tastes like?"
     "Chicken," Mari shrugged. "Everything tastes like chicken."
     "Well, what does chicken taste like?" Dream asked.
     Mari stared at her. "What does one hand clapping sound like?"
     Dream's eyes widened, and she hid her face in her lap. She'd always hated those zen questions that Mari asked from time to time.
     "It's pretty good," Dava said, stripping meat from a tiny bone.
     Mari gnawed on her own squirrel leg. "Yeah. They're too small to be worth it most days, but in a pinch..."
     "Pity they've probably evacuated the island," Dava said.
     "Now I'm feeling all bold, though. Let's go frogging tomorrow. I'll make frog legs for dinner."
     "We're hiking up the volcano tomorrow," Dani reminded them.
     "Day after, then," Mari said.
     "Sure. It's a date."
     Mari looked at Dava sidelong. "But not a date date."
     "Oh. No." He looked at her the same way. "Just a... an appointment."
     "Right."

***

Voting, Week Four:
     Inda was looking much more sane this morning as he awoke the contestants with "Welcome to the Jungle" on the boom-box. Mari, of course, was the only one who could tolerate being woken by jet-engine decibel music. Everyone else dug out the coconuts they'd hidden in their sleeping bags and chucked them at Inda.
     After the usual coconut-chucking, complaining about hiking, and actual hiking, they had a surprise picnic dinner on top of the volcano.
     "I kind of felt bad about the whole machete-wielding thing," Inda explained as the Survivors dug into the piles of food on the picnic table. Nobody was really listening as they consumed more calories in one mouthful than they'd had for the past month. A bowl of palak paneer was proving most popular, but Mari focused on the taquitos.
     "As soon as you've had your fill," Inda sighed over the noisy eating sounds, "we'll get on with the voting. You have to talk to the camera again this week, though." The mad eating paused as everyone looked around for napkins. Somehow, it was all right to eat like a pig on television, as long as you were neat again for the confessional.
     Mari and Dava were being remarkably civil to each other. Also remarkably, Dream and UPChuck were sniping at each other and had been all the way up the hill. Apparently the squirrel thing hadn't gone over that well -- Dream was less interested in Uly now that his Dr. Doolittle skills were dormant, and he was a bit ticked at the lack of her attention. And she also kind of blamed him for not defending Kevin, aka "dinner". It was complex, yet really, really stupid. At least, that was Mari's take on it.
     Dani was feeling like a fifth wheel, so between bites of veggie lo mein (Inda really had gone all out on this picnic) she attempted a conversation with their host. "So who do you think is going this week?"
     "I couldn't care less," Inda replied. He was eating a ham sandwich, arguably the least labor-intensive food choice on the table. "I think all of you are at risk. Except maybe you."
     "You think?"
     "I don't think Marianna and Dava's alliance is against you."
     Dani's eyes widened. "That's an alliance? I thought they were... fooling around."
     "Not that the cameras have seen." Inda reached for the potato chips -- lime and black pepper flavor. "Although who knows what these psychics can do inside their minds."
     "Not... that." Dani looked over at Mari and Dava, who were full and had started a mini-dessert fight. "I don't think so, anyway. And... ew."
     Inda watched the budding food fight (Mari accidentally hit UPChuck with an eclair), then decided to cut it off. "All right, that's enough. We'll vote now."
     "Just as soon as I get this eclair filling out of my eye," UPChuck growled in Mari's general direction.
     "It was an accident," she protested. "I was aiming for Dava. Since he got me with that blueberry tart." She wiped some blueberry filling off her nose and ate it. "Mmm. Can you do that with raspberry next?"
     Dava inspected the table. "I think the raspberry ones are all gone."
     "Damn."
     "And anyway, you're not going to throw any more food. You're going to vote now," Inda said, shooing them all to their seats around the fire. The day had faded around them, and the sun was setting beyond the palm tree tops.
     "Dude, is it that late already?" Mari said, wiping whipped cream out of her hair and smearing it on the back of Dava's t-shirt. "I could have sworn we got up here at lunch time."
     "Just go with it," Dani suggested. "I question very little in life, and look how successful I am."
     "Depends how you define success," Mari shrugged.
     "Daniela, you vote first tonight," Inda said loudly.
     "Okay!" She bounced up off of her log and headed over to the voting area. "Hi, camera!" she said cheerfully, picking up the grease pencil and scrawling her vote on a piece of recycled paper. "I'm voting for UPChuck because now that the squirrels have left, I'm not afraid of them anymore. And I never really liked him. I consider Dava a friend, regardless of what he does with my sister. And Mari's my sister. And Dream... well, we had fun finding shiny objects and singing old songs yesterday. So that's it."
     She bounded back to her seat and looked up at Inda expectantly.
     "What?" he said. "Do you want a cookie?"
     "Um... sure!"
     "There might still be some left on the table. Dava, you vote next."
     Dava stood up, walked somberly over to the table (which was in direct contrast to the chocolate frosting streak across his forehead), and picked up the pencil. "I'm voting for Ulysses, mostly because I can't vote for myself. I like the girls, and it's not about getting rid of competition. They're all like sisters to me. Kind of. Not really. But he's torn up about this squirrel thing, and if Mari starts hunting from now on, it will get really uncomfortable with him and Dream. But I can't bring myself to vote for Dream." He dropped the vote in the bucket and returned to the circle.
     "Dream?"
     "Oh, camera... what a week. I still can't believe Mari killed and ate a squirrel. She's one of my best friends since forever, and it hurts me to do this, but it hurt that squirrel a heck of a lot more. So my vote is for Mari."
     "I bet I'm getting some votes this week," Mari joked as she leaned on the voting table. "Dream and UPChuck are probably hating me for the squirrel thing. Wait, what am I saying? Not probably. Definitely. Anyway, I promised Dava I'd vote for him, but if I do that, the way the wind is blowing, we'd probably end up with a tie. So I'll vote for UPChuck, not because I really want him to go, but because I don't want ME to go."
     UPChuck didn't even give Inda a chance to call his name after Mari returned. He strode right up to the table, boldly wrote "MARIANNA" on the page, and dropped his vote in. "Squirrel-killer," he hissed into the camera.
     'Wow, he's really not taking this well,' Mari thought-projected to Dava. He glanced over at her and winked. Dream looked suspiciously at them, but her strong ethical sense simply would not let her pry into their minds.
     "This ends the voting!" Inda proclaimed. Dramatic music boomed out of seemingly nowhere, and Dani squealed and jumped into Mari's lap.
     "Get off of me!" Mari said, trying to remove her sister.
     "Oops, forgot to warn you," Inda chuckled. "I had speakers installed for dramatic music, so I don't have to dub it in afterward for the telecast."
     "I hate you," Dani said, but there wasn't much heat behind it. She remained on Mari's lap, however.
     "Mooom..." Mari moaned. "Dani's being a pain again..."
     "Mom's not here," Dani pointed out.
     "And if she was I wouldn't actually ask for help, since you're the favorite anyway," Mari countered.
     "Hello, results over here?" Inda said, mixing up the votes in the bucket. All five of them.
     "Yeah, go ahead, we're listening," Mari said, grabbing Dani's ribcage and tickling her.
     "Eep, hands off!"
     "All right," Inda said, raising his voice again. "We have one vote for Mari... one for UPChuck-- I mean, Uly. Another for Uly. One more for Mari..." He paused for dramatic effect before revealing the final vote. "And the last vote, breaking the tie... is..."
     "Going to be revealed after the break!" Mari exclaimed, finally dumping Dani off her lap as she Seacrested the results.
     "No," Inda frowned. "This isn't Idol. The person voted off this week is Uly."
     UPChuck narrowed his eyes at Mari and chattered in creepy squirrel language.
     "Inda, airlift him! He's crazy!" Mari shouted, jumping behind Dava as if that would protect her.
     Dani scrambled up off of the ground and stood, arms akimbo, facing UPChuck. "Leave peaceably, squirrel-boy, or you'll regret messing with the DeSka sisters."
     "Um, ditto," Mari called out from behind Dava's blue hair.
     "Okay, down the mountain now," Inda said, ushering them all toward the exit. "Move along. Boat leaves at midnight, and you know how long it takes to get up and down this thing."

***

By the time the Survivors returned to base camp, a few fat drops of rain had started falling. As Inda and UPChuck left in the motorboat, the rest gathered up their sleeping bags and moved under the shelter Mari had made them build four weeks ago.
     The skies opened. Thunder crashed, lighting struck off-shore, a river started to develop where the path into the jungle used to be, and Daniela leapt into Mari's lap.
     "Not again," she sighed, starting to push Dani off. "What month is it?"
     "I think it's December," Dani said, wrapping her arms around Mari's neck in a choke hold. "Why?"
     "It doesn't seem like the right time of year for this kind of weather."
     "I don't think it's December already," Dream said. "The hurricane was in August, and it's only been five or six weeks since that. It's October at latest."
     "Oh. Okay. I'm going to bed," Mari yawned. She tried one last time to remove Dani.
     "Can I sleep with you tonight?" Dani asked as another huge roll of thunder shook the island. "I really don't like this."
     "No freaking kidding. Fine," Mari sighed. "Just let go long enough for me to get my sleeping bag unzipped." She buried herself in said sleeping bag, and Dani edged up close to her and snuggled down.
     Dava set himself up so his head was near Mari's. "Still want to go frogging tomorrow?"
     "I don't know," she mumbled. "The pond will probably be flooded."
     "Right. Well, good night."
     "Good night, Dava."
     "Good night, Dani," Dava said.
     "Good night, Dream," Dani said.
     "Good night, squirrel killer," Dream said.
     "Good night, John Boy," Mari laughed sleepily.